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Dr. George Simon knows how people push your buttons. Your children--especially teens--are expert at it, as is your mate. A co-worker may quietly undermine your efforts while professing to be helpful, or your boss may prey on your weaknesses. Manipulative people have two goals: to win and to look good doing it. Often those they abuse are only vaguely aware of what is happening to them. In this eye-opening book, you'll also discover...
* 4 reasons why victims have a hard time leaving abusive relationships
* Power tactics manipulators use to push their own agendas and justify their behavior
*Ways to redefine the rules of engagement between you and an abuser
* How to spot potential weaknesses in your character that can set you up for manipulation.
* 12 tools for personal empowerment to help you maintain greater strength in all relationships
Acclaimed social psychologist Claude M. Steele offers an insider's look at his groundbreaking findings on stereotypes and identity. Through dramatic personal stories, he shares the experiments and studies that show, again and again, that exposing subjects to stereotypes-merely reminding a group of female maths students about to take a test, for example, that women are considered naturally inferior to men at maths-impairs their performance in the area affected by the stereotype. Steele's conclusions shed new light on a host of social phenomena, from the racial and gender gaps in standardised test scores to the belief in the superior athletic prowess of black men. Whistling Vivaldi offers insight into how we form our senses of identity and lays out a plan for mitigating the negative effects of "stereotype threat" and reshaping our identities.
A central bond, a cherished value, a unique relationship, a
profound human need, a type of love. What is the nature of
friendship, and what is its significance in our lives? How has
friendship changed since the ancient Greeks began to analyze it,
and how has modern technology altered its very definition? In this
fascinating exploration of friendship through the ages, one of the
most thought-provoking philosophers of our time tracks historical
ideas of friendship, gathers a diversity of friendship stories from
the annals of myth and literature, and provides unexpected insights
into our friends, ourselves, and the role of friendships in an
ethical life. A. C. Grayling roves the rich traditions of
friendship in literature, culture, art, and philosophy, bringing
into his discussion familiar pairs as well as unfamiliar--Achilles
and Patroclus, David and Jonathan, Coleridge and Wordsworth, Huck
Finn and Jim. Grayling lays out major philosophical interpretations
of friendship, then offers his own take, drawing on personal
experiences and an acute awareness of vast cultural shifts that
have occurred. With penetrating insight he addresses internet-based
friendship, contemporary mixed gender friendships, how friendships
may supersede family relationships, one's duty within friendship,
the idea of friendship to humanity, and many other topics of
Faced with the ultimate challenge of life-confronting your death-how would you want to be remembered? Are there stories you want to tell? Experiences you want to relay? Explanations about how you felt and why? Maybe you wish to ensure that future generations know your family lore. Perhaps you seek meaning and purpose and don't know how to access them. It's likely that you seek comfort and strength. But at the same time a deep desire to heal unresolved issues may unsettle you. And reaching for a spiritual connection may be the path you want to find.
Everyone wants to know how to be more influential. But most of us don't really think we can have the kind of magnetism or charisma that we associate with someone like Bill Clinton or Oprah Winfrey unless it comes naturally. Now, in Compelling People, which is already being taught at Harvard and Columbia Business Schools, John Neffinger and Matthew Kohut show that this isn't something we have to be born with-it's something we can learn. Expanding on the themes in their co-authored Harvard Business Review cover story "Connect, Then Lead," they trace the path to influence through a balance of strength (the root of respect) and warmth (the root of affection). Each seems simple, but only a few of us figure out the tricky task of projecting both at once. The ability to master this dynamic is so rare that we celebrate and elevate those people who have managed to do it. Drawing on cutting-edge social science research as well as their own work with Fortune 500 executives, members of Congress, TED speakers, and Nobel Prize winners, Neffinger and Kohut reveal: - The common thread connecting Machiavelli and Martin Luther King - The secret technique behind the success of Bill Clinton, Ann Richards and Denzel Washington-one that you can use today - How looks affect our career prospects - The single best strategy for getting someone to agree with you Offering practical advice for a range of common and challenging situations, Compelling People explains how we size each other up-and how we can learn to win the admiration, respect, and affection we desire.
An innovative, groundbreaking book that will captivate readers of
Malcolm Gladwell, Daniel Pink, "The Power of Habit," and "Quiet"
"A thoughtful, scholarly yet accessible account of emotion that speaks to current debates associated with the 'affective turn' in disciplines including sociology, cultural studies, geography and psychology... invaluable for anyone wanting to understand contemporary engagements with affect, emotion and feeling." - John Cromby, Loughborough University "This is a lucid, engaging, and thoroughly insightful review of current social scientific thinking on emotions in social life by a leading scholar in the field. Burkitt advances a radically relational conceptualisation of emotion - one which has far-reaching implications for current debates surrounding this topic. The book is sure to become essential reading for both students and researchers interested in emotion" - Jason Hughes, University of Leicester "A masterful exposition of the links between emotions and social relations. Ian Burkitt develops a powerful theory of emotions as arising in patterns of relationships. Extending the pragmatist approach of James and Dewey, Burkitt argues convincingly that emotions can be reduced to neither neurophysiological processes nor discursive practices, but are complexes of the physical, social and discursive realms as these are experienced by living human bodies in relationships. Empirically rich and theoretically deep, this is a highly readable book. - Svend Brinkmann, University of Aalborg This book is a compelling and timely addition to the study of emotions, arguing that emotion is a response to the way in which people are embedded in patterns of relationship, both to others and to significant social and political events or situations. Going beyond the traditional discursive understanding of emotions, Burkitt investigates emotions as a complex and dynamic phenomenon that includes the whole self, body and mind, but which always occur in relation to others.
"The Overview Effect is an important book in helping people see that your attitude does change when you see the Earth from the space perspective - an experience that seems to be an almost universal phenomenon." - Edgar Mitchell, Apollo 14 astronaut, founder of the Institute of Noetic Sciences, founding member of the Overview Institute "It is a dynamic, crystal-clear view that just glows, and that doesn't come across in the pictures and videos. You feel more a part of it when you are looking at it that way. So it is a reaffirmation of what a beautiful and special place the Earth is." - Nicole Stott, NASA astronaut "Space travel needs a new birth, and if we can tap into the desire to go into space, incredible things can come from it." - Sir Richard Branson, founder of the Virgin Group, which includes Virgin Galactic More than 30 years ago, Frank White coined the term "Overview Effect" to describe the cognitive shift in awareness that results from the experience of viewing Earth from orbit or the moon. He found that, with great consistency, this experience profoundly affects space travelers' worldviews - their perceptions of themselves and our planet, and our understanding of the future. White found that astronauts know from direct experience what the rest of us know only intellectually: we live on a planet that is like a natural spaceship moving through the universe at a high rate of speed. We are, in fact, the crew of "Spaceship Earth," as Buckminster Fuller described our world. In The Overview Effect, Third Edition Frank White expands on his original concept, which has now gained worldwide recognition and exposure. Using interviews with and writings by numerous astronauts and cosmonauts, he describes space exploration and settlement as necessary next steps in the evolution of human civilization and consciousness. The third edition features new interviews with the following astronauts, space advocates, and New Space entrepreneurs: Helen P. Sharman * Michael Lopez-Alegria * Sandra H. Magnus * John B. Herrington * Ron Garan * Akihiko Hoshide * Nicole Stott * Sir Richard Branson * George Whitesides * Loretta Hidalgo Whitesides
The world of shopping is at a crossroads. While online sales are growing at runaway speed, many businesses are growing at runaway speed, many businesses are finding themselves left behind, discovering that what has worked so long offline does not work online, and what works online does not necessarily translate offline: it simply doesn't 'click'. Packed with tips, guidance, and real-world case studies - from online niche stores Bellabox and Facetache to the universal appeal of Groupon, and from offline discount stores Dollar Tree and Poundland to the luxury Selfridges. Internet psychologist Graham Jones reveals the 'why' of consumer behaviour online, how it differs from offline behaviour, and how you can use this understanding to create a store that connects with and engages your customers on both a practical and a psychological level - a store that demonstrates true click.ology. Using an accessible five-step CLICK system for turning clicks into dollars, the book shows how to learn from the experience of both on- and offline , and apply lessons to both. Whether you're running a small business website or that of a big corporation, whether you're operating purely online or offline too, CLICK.OLOGY shows how you can thrive in a dynamic retail world.
You are a mind reader, born with an extraordinary ability to understand what others think, feel, believe, want, and know. It's a sixth sense you use every day, in every personal and professional relationship you have. At its best, this ability allows you to achieve the most important goal in almost any life: connecting, deeply and intimately and honestly, to other human beings. At its worst, it is a source of misunderstanding and unnecessary conflict, leading to damaged relationships and broken dreams.
How good are you at knowing the minds of others? How well can you guess what others think of you, know who really likes you, or tell when someone is lying? How well do you really understand the minds of those closest to you, from your spouse to your kids to your best friends? Do you really know what your coworkers, employees, competitors, or clients want?
In this illuminating exploration of one of the great mysteries of the human mind, University of Chicago psychologist Nicholas Epley introduces us to what scientists have learned about our ability to understand the most complicated puzzle on the planet?other people?and the surprising mistakes we so routinely make. Why are we sometimes blind to the minds of others, treating them like objects or animals? Why do we sometimes talk to our cars, or the stars, as if there is a mind that can hear us? Why do we so routinely believe that others think, feel, and want what we do when, in fact, they do not? And why do we believe we understand our spouses, family, and friends so much better than we actually do? "Mindwise" will not turn other people into open books, but it will give you the wisdom to revolutionize how you think about them?and yourself.
Perfect for revision, these guides explain the unit requirements, summarise the content and include specimen questions with graded answers. Each full-colour New Edition Student Unit Guide provides ideal preparation for your unit exam: - Feel confident you understand the unit: each guide comprehensively covers the unit content and includes topic summaries, knowledge check questions and a reference index - Get to grips with the exam requirements: the specific skills on which you will be tested are explored and explained - Analyse exam-style questions: graded student responses will help you focus on areas where you can improve your exam technique and performance
One of the world's most respected voices on erotic intelligence, Esther Perel offers a bold, provocative new take on intimacy and sex. Mating in Captivity invites us to explore the paradoxical union of domesticity and sexual desire, and explains what it takes to bring lust home.
Drawing on more than twenty years of experience as a couples therapist, Perel examines the complexities of sustaining desire. Through case studies and lively discussion, Perel demonstrates how more exciting, playful, and even poetic sex is possible in long-term relationships. Wise, witty, and as revelatory as it is straightforward, Mating in Captivity is a sensational book that will transform the way you live and love.
Self, community and psychology is a reader for students at the University of South Africa studying community psychology. It brings together some of the best recent local work written form critical, social constructionist, participatory and liberatory perspectives. Self, community and psychology provides a broad introduction to community psychology, power and social formations and posits a liberatory response utilising critical analysis, self-definition and collective action.
To Have Or to Be? is one of the seminal books of the second half of the 20th century. Nothing less than a manifesto for a new social and psychological revolution to save our threatened planet, this book is a summary of the penetrating thought of Eric Fromm. His thesis is that two modes of existence struggle for the spirit of humankind: the having mode, which concentrates on material possessions, power, and aggression, and is the basis of the universal evils of greed, envy, and violence; and the being mode, which is based on love, the pleasure of sharing, and in productive activity. To Have Or to Be? is a brilliant program for socioeconomic change.
The Olympics. X-Factor. The Rich List. The Nobel Prize.Everywhere you look: competition - for fame, money, attention, status. Being top seems to be everything - but what is it costing all of us? We depend on competition and expect it to identify the best, make complicated decisions easy and to motivate the lazy and inspire the dreamers. But, as Margaret Heffernan shows in this eye-opening look at competition, competition regularly produces just what we don't want: rising levels of fraud, cheating, stress, inequality and political stalemate. Siblings won't speak to each other. Children burn out at school. Doping proliferates among athletes. Auditors and fund managers go to jail for insider trading. Winners seem to take all while the desire to win consumes all, inciting panic and despair. We now know that competition often doesn't work, that the best do not always rise to the top and the so-called efficiency of competition creates a great deal of waste. So what are our alternatives? What are the skills needed for creative collaboration and how do we hone them? Talking to scientists, musicians, athletes, entrepreneurs and executives, in the follow-up to her bestselling Wilful Blindness, Margaret Heffernan has discovered that, around the world, individuals and organizations are finding creative, cooperative ways to work that don't pit people against each other but support them in their desire to work together. While the rest of the world remains mired in pitiless sniping, racing to the bottom, the future belongs to the people and companies who have learned that they are greater working together than against one another. Some call that soft but it's harder than anything they've done before. They are the real winners, sharing a bigger prize.
A surprising and intriguing examination of how scarcity--and our flawed responses to it--shapes our lives, our society, and our culture
Why do successful people get things done at the last minute? Why does poverty persist? Why do organizations get stuck firefighting? Why do the lonely find it hard to make friends? These questions seem unconnected, yet Sendhil Mullainathan and Eldar Shafir show that they are all examples of a mind-set produced by scarcity.
Drawing on cutting-edge research from behavioral science and economics, Mullainathan and Shafir show that scarcity creates a similar psychology for everyone struggling to manage with less than they need. Busy people fail to manage their time efficiently for the same reasons the poor and those maxed out on credit cards fail to manage their money. The dynamics of scarcity reveal why dieters find it hard to resist temptation, why students and busy executives mismanage their time, and why sugarcane farmers are smarter after harvest than before. Once we start thinking in terms of scarcity and the strategies it imposes, the problems of modern life come into sharper focus.
Mullainathan and Shafir discuss how scarcity affects our daily lives, recounting anecdotes of their own foibles and making surprising connections that bring this research alive. Their book provides a new way of understanding why the poor stay poor and the busy stay busy, and it reveals not only how scarcity leads us astray but also how individuals and organizations can better manage scarcity for greater satisfaction and success.
There is nothing quite like the pain and shock caused when a partner has been unfaithful. The hurt partner often experiences a profound loss of self-respect and falls into a depression that can last for years. For the relationship, infidelity is often a death blow. "After the Affair" is the first book to help readers survive this crisis. Written by a clinical psychologist, it guides both hurt and unfaithful partners through the three stages of healing: normalizing feelings, deciding whether to recommit and revitalizing the relationship. It provides proven, practical advice to help the couple change their behavior toward each other, cultivate trust and forgiveness and build a healthier, more conscious intimate partnership.
Un-Agoraphobic offers a comprehensive, step-by-step self-help program for overcoming agoraphobia and panic attacks. Since overcoming his own disorder twenty years ago, Mathew has been leading support groups and recovery programs for people with agoraphobia. He understands what agoraphobes need and how to deliver it. No one knows exactly what causes agoraphobia or panic attacks, but it clearly involves some misfirings in the brain. The good news is that recent neuroscience research suggests the brain is retrainable?at any age. The basis for any recovery plan for anxiety disorders is a highly structured approach each day. Mathew provides a daily schedule that lays out a clear set of steps and considerations for conquering this affliction, including: *writing every day *cultivating present-moment thinking *taking a new approach to food and eating *choosing a therapist *starting a peer support group *using visualization techniques specifically designed for overcoming anxiety and panic *taking medications, if appropriate *dealing with children, spouse, parents, friends, coworkers, teachers, bosses, and more *taking your first trip out of the house Mathew includes FAQs, general survival tips, and a special chapter on tips for spouses and loved ones. Un-Agoraphobic is candid, funny, prescriptive, and spot on for panic disorders?by an author with a lot of life experience under his belt.
"A lively and provocative look at how evolution shapes our behavior
and our lives."
Are you looking to enrich a healthy relationship, revitalize a tired one, or rescue one gone awry? We all want a lifetime of love, support, and companionship. But sometimes we need a little help.
Enter Dr. Sue Johnson, developer of Emotionally Focused Couple Therapy and ?the best couple therapist in the world, ? according to bestselling relationship expert Dr. John Gottman. In "Hold Me Tight," Dr. Johnson shares her groundbreaking and remarkably successful program for creating stronger, more secure relationships.
The message of "Hold Me Tight" is simple: Forget about learning how to argue better, analyzing your early childhood, making grand romantic gestures, or experimenting with new sexual positions. Instead, get to the emotional underpinnings of your relationship by recognizing that you are emotionally attached to and dependent on your partner in much the same way that a child is on a parent for nurturing, soothing, and protection. Dr. Johnson teaches that the way to enhance or save a relationship is to be open, attuned, and responsive to each other and to reestablish emotional connection. With this in mind, she focuses on key moments in a relationship?from Recognizing the Demon Dialogues to Forgiving Injuries?and uses them as touch points for seven healing conversations. These conversations give you insight into the defining moments in your relationship and guide you in reshaping these moments to create a secure and lasting bond.
This work explores the function of both divisive and uniting symbols in various conflict settings around the world. It takes a fairly broad perspective on what constitutes a symbol, to include objects such as flags, signs, language, and monuments, all of which convey conflicting meanings in a society affected by conflict. In addition, the authors include commemorations and other dynamic events that serve as a means for groups or individuals to connect with past generations, celebrate a heritage, and possibly express religiosity. In order to provide context for the nuances surrounding the symbols, there are brief historical overviews for each conflict featured in the volume. In each chapter, three issues are emphasized: the particular symbols that are divisive in the specific culture; how these symbols were used to perpetuate conflict; and how these symbols can be used or modified to bring unification. Contributions come from authors from around the world that have conducted empirical studies on intergroup relationships or have provided significant academic contributions in the area of symbols and collective memories represented in theoretical publications. Taken together, the contents of the volume provide a rich tapestry of intellectual analyses to the diverse selection of conflict settings from around the globe. In addition to the nine case studies, there is an introductory chapter, which grounds the discussion in current peace psychology literature as well as provides future directions. This volume is a valuable resource to many, as the focus on symbols can span many disciplines such as political science, anthropology, sociology, psychology, and art. Furthermore, it is of significant interest to all scholars and peace activists studying these various countries and their conflicts.
The Third Edition of this much celebrated textbook continues to focus on the four major and influential perspectives in contemporary social psychology - social cognition, social identity, social representations, and discursive psychology. A foundational chapter presenting an account of these perspectives is then followed by topic-based chapters from the point of view of each perspective in turn, discussing commonalities and divergences across each of them.
Key Features of the Third Edition:
-Now includes coverage of the social neuroscience paradigm and research on implicit social cognition
-Updated pedagogical features and visual material
-An extended conclusion covers the ways in which the different approaches of the field intersect as well as a general discussion of the direction in which the field is moving.
Social Cognition: An Integrated Introduction is an integrative, holistic textbook that will enhance the reader's understanding of social cognition and of each of the topical issues considered. It remains a key textbook for psychology students, particularly those on courses in social psychology and social cognition.
When slighted, misunderstood, cut in front of, annoyed, taken advantage of, or treated rudely, most people avoid their bosses, ignore coworkers, change hairdressers, complain to friends, pound their fists, or rant on social media. They often miss the most positive, effective alternative of all: confronting positively. Now, for everyone who was never taught or never realized that between "bully" and "wimp" is a range of behavior that is positive, dignified, and effective for dealing with life's bothersome situations, there is "The Power of Positive Confrontation." This book teaches you the vital skills you need to confront others, communicate effectively, and live a more conflict-free life. In this updated edition, communications expert Barbara Pachter shares a practical, step-by-step guide to tackling conflicts in any situation, including a new section on navigating sticky situations online. "The Power of Positive Confrontation" reveals: The consequences of not confronting or of confronting negativelyHow to accurately assess what is bothering you and whyThree essential steps of polite and powerful confrontationVital verbal and nonverbal skills that make or break communication, including common language pitfallsStrategies for assertive communication, whether face to face, in writing, by phone, or online
Do you know one of these men?
The catch-me-if-you-can lover...Phil's romantic and passionate one minute, distant and retreating the next.
These are all classic examples of the passive-aggressive man. This personality syndrome -- in which hostility wears a mask of passivity -- is currently the number one source of men's problems in relationships and on the job. In Living with the Passive-Aggressive Man, Scott Wetzler draws upon numerous case histories from his own practice to explain how and why the passive-aggressive man thinks, feels, and acts the way he does. Dr. Wetzler also offers advice on:
How to avoid playing victim, manager, or rescuer to the "P-A"
Living with a man's passive aggression can be an emotional seesaw ride. But armed with this book, you can avoid the bumpy landings.
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