Second Book of Verse (Paperback)

This historic book may have numerous typos and missing text. Purchasers can download a free scanned copy of the original book (without typos) from the publisher. Not indexed. Not illustrated. 1892. Excerpt: ... THE BOTTLE AND THE BIRD. NCE on r. time a friend of mine prevailed on me to go To see the dazzling splendors of a sinful ballet show; And after we had revelled in the saltatory sights, We sought a neighboring cafe for more tangible delights. When I demanded of my friend what viands he preferred, He quoth: "A large cold bottle, and a small hot bird " Fool that I was, I did not know what anguish hidden lies Within the morceau that allures the nostrils and the eyes There is a glorious candor in an honest quart of wine, A certain inspiration which I cannot well define How it bubbles, how it sparkles, how its gurgling seems to say: "Come on a tide of rapture let me float your soul away " But the crispy, steaming mouthful that is spread upon your plate, --How it discounts human sapience and satirizes fate Vou would n't think a thing so small could cause the pains and aches That certainly accrue to him that of that thing partakes; To me, at least, (a guileless wight ) it never once occurred What horror was encompassed in that small hot bird. Oh, what a head I had on me when I awoke next day, And what a firm conviction of intestinal decay What seas of mineral water and of bromide I applied To quench those fierce volcanic fires that rioted inside And oh the thousand solemn, awful vows I plighted then Never to tax my system with a small hot bird again The doctor seemed to doubt that birds could worry people so, But, bless him since I ate the bird, I guess I ought to know The acidous condition of my stomach, so he said, Bespoke a vinous irritant that amplified my head, And, ergo, the causation of the thing, as he inferred, Was the large cold bottle, --not the small hot bird. Of course I know it was n't, and I'm sure you '11 say I'm right If ever it has been ...