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A deeply felt account of the relationship between a mother and son, and an exploration of what care for the dying means in contemporary society.
The book is emotionally complex – funny, sad and angry – but above all, heartfelt and honest. It speaks boldly of challenges faced by all of us, challenges which are often not spoken about and hidden, but which deserve urgent attention. This is first and foremost a work of the heart, a reflection on what relationships mean and should mean.
There is much in the book about relationships of care and exploitation in southern Africa, and about white Jewish identity in an African context. But despite the specific and absorbing references to places and contexts, the book offers a broader, more universal view.
All parents of adult children, and all adults who have parents alive, or have lost their parents, will find much in this book to make them laugh, cry, think and feel.
A secret torment for some, a proud responsibility for others, ‘black tax’ is a daily reality for thousands of black South Africans. In this thought-provoking and moving anthology, a provocative range of voices share their deeply personal stories.
With the majority of black South Africans still living in poverty today, many black middle-class households are connected to working-class or jobless homes. Some believe supporting family members is an undeniable part of African culture and question whether it should even be labelled as a kind of tax. Others point to the financial pressure it places on black students and professionals, who, as a consequence, struggle to build their own wealth. Many feel they are taking over what is essentially a government responsibility. The contributions also investigate the historical roots of black tax, the concept of the black family and the black middle class.
In giving voice to so many different perspectives, Black Tax hopes to start a dialogue on this widespread social phenomenon.
In his new book, It’s Not A Big Thing In Life, Arnie Witkin asks you to consider what actions you should take in handling life’s troubles and triumphs. It started as a series of writings meant for his grandchildren, but he gave an early draft to a friend’s granddaughter who was starting university. It had such a positive effect on her that she believed that it should be for grandchildren the world over and their parents and grandparents. Hence the publication of this book.
In a world of algorithms and artificial intelligence this timeless and universal common-sense guide bridges the gap between the generations. It recognises that all the ubiquitous tech in the world does not change basic human emotions that have been around since time immemorial.
Some of the 65 topics covered include:
In 1990 two South African mothers were faced with an impossible choice, one that no mother should ever have to make. Should they surrender the child they had lovingly raised in order to get back the baby they had given birth to?
Megs Clinton-Parker and Sandy Dawkins chose nurture over nature, simply unable to give up their two-year-old sons who were switched at birth at an East Rand hospital. Instead they decided to try to make their strange relationship work, although they lived in different cities, 500km apart. And they decided to sue the South African state, whose negligence had altered the fates of two families forever. Robin Dawkins and Gavin Clinton-Parker grew up living each other’s lives, brothers-but-not-brothers, acutely aware that their mothers’ hearts were torn.
Unable to escape the consequences of the swap, Robin decided at the age of 15 that it was time to claim what was rightfully his, adding a further twist to this bitter saga.
“Whenever I see a Manyano woman, I see a woman who has the world in her hands and has the power to make things change because of the power that is prayer”. - Stella Shumbe
“As a Manyano, you listen to painful journeys and experiences of people … They talk about abuse at home, unemployment, children who are reckless and all the sensitive things you can think of … We come together to share our pain and struggles.’ - Nobuntu Madwe
Lihle Ngcobozi, herself the progeny of three generations of Manyano women, takes an original, fresh look at the meaning of the Manyano. Between male-dominated struggle narratives and Western feminist misreadings, this church-based women's organisation has become a mere footnote to history.
Long overlooked as the juggernaut of black women’s organising that it has been and continues to be, the Manyano has immense historical and cultural meaning in black communities across the country. To this day, it is still evolving to meet the changing needs of black South Africans. Here, the Manyano women speak for themselves, in an African feminist meditation rendered by one of their own.
A transformative guide to building more fulfilling relationships with
colleagues, friends, partners, and family, based on the landmark
Interpersonal Dynamics ("Touchy Feely") course at Stanford's Graduate
School of Business
A quest is never what you expect it to be.
Elizabeth Madeline Martin spends her days in a retirement home in Cape Town, watching the pigeons and squirrels on the branch of a tree outside her window. Bedridden, her memory fading, she can recall her early childhood spent in a small wood-and-iron house in Blackridge on the outskirts of Pietermaritzburg. Though she remembers the place in detail – dogs, a mango tree, a stream – she has no idea of where exactly it is. ‘My memory is full of blotches,’ she tells her daughter Julia, ‘like ink left about and knocked over.’
Julia resolves to find the Blackridge house: with her mother lonely and confused, would this, perhaps, bring some measure of closure? A journey begins that traverses family history, forgotten documents, old photographs, and the maps that stake out a country’s troubled past – maps whose boundaries nature remains determined to resist. Kind strangers, willing to assist in the search, lead to unexpected discoveries of ancestors and wars and lullabies. Folded into this quest are the tender conversations between a daughter and a mother who does not have long to live.
Taken as one, The Blackridge House is a meditation on belonging, of the stories we tell of home and family, of the precarious footprint of life.
How do you find hope and even joy in a world that is racist, sexist and facing climate crisis? How do you prepare your children for it, but also fill them with all the boundlessness and eccentricity that they deserve and that life has to offer?
In Brown Baby, Nikesh Shukla explores themes of racism, feminism, parenting and our shifting ideas of home. This memoir, by turns heartwrenching, hilariously funny and intensely relatable, is dedicated to the author’s two young daughters, and serves as an act of remembrance to the grandmother they never had a chance to meet. Through love, grief, food and fatherhood, Shukla shows how it’s possible to believe in hope.
This is a heartbreaking, beautifully written memoir about tragic loss, a family mystery, a son's faith and his long quest to find his absent mother. Darling Baby Mine is the dramatic and moving story of John's search for his mother, who disappeared when he was just four years old following the disintegration of his parents' marriage. Growing up, it was as if she had never existed - he didn't even know her name. The only image he had of her was the vague memory of a woman smoking and laughing. Then, as an adult, he tried to track her down. After surmounting many obstacles, including his father's implacable silence and his own doubts and fears, John finally found her in a UK mental institution where she had been held for thirty-five years. He was then faced with trying to re-establish the deepest of human relationships: the bond between a mother and her child.
No relationship is more fulfilling, infuriating, emotional, and problematic than that of mother and daughter. Now, in a work filled with truth, surprises, and humor, renowned psychologist and author Martha Manning offers mothers and daughters of all ages a new way to understand each other. Challenging the accepted premise that this powerful bond must be severed for emotional growth, Manning shows us why this precious attachment is never outgrown, how, if it is damaged, it can be healed, and what will enrich this lifelong commitment while fostering essential independence. The key is empathy, and Manning provides potent tools to help us build stronger ties and celebrate the crazy twists, joys, and secrets inherent in this most glorious of life connections.
Combining personal experiences and scrupulous research, The Common Thread helps each of us develop a mutually empowering relationship -- and laugh, too -- as we more deeply connect with and appreciate the mother or daughter we love.
It's 1983 and best friends Vicky and Lucy swear that they will always be there for each other, that they'll never let anyone come between them. But fast forward 4 years and life on the Canterbury Estate has gotten very messy. Lucy has fallen for local policeman's son, Jimmy. And Vicky is madly in love with Paddy, the charming but ruthless local bad boy. The boys are bitter enemies and determined to keep the two girls apart. But then Vicky is accused of murder, and even her drug-dealer boyfriend wants her mouth shut, permanently. Maybe Lucy is the only one who can save her... Love, murder, revenge. Who can you really trust when there's blood on your hands?
“I saw my mommy walking to the court with a hoodie on and a scarf covering her face. She looked almost like someone that was poor. People were cursing at her… and that broke me. This is the woman who was there for me every day, making lunch for me and my friends when we came from school, and now here she is on television being called a criminal.”
The kidnapping of baby Zephany Nurse from the cot beside her mother’s hospital bed made headline news. Desperate pleas from her parents to return her safely went unanswered. There was no trace of the baby. For 17 years, on her birthday, the Nurse family lit candles and hoped and prayed.
Living not far away from the Nurses, 17-year-old Miché Solomon had just started Matric. She had a boyfriend. She had devoted parents. She was thinking about the upcoming school dance and the dress her mother was going to make for her. She had no idea that a new girl at her school, who bore an uncanny resemblance to her, and a DNA test would shake her world to its foundations.
Miché is now 22. This is her story – for the first time in her own words. Told with astonishing maturity, honesty and compassion, it is also a story of what it means to love and be loved, and of claiming your identity.
My Mother, My Daughter, My Self is a significant self-revelatory work which chronicles the separation process between mother and child, focusing most specifically on the mother/daughter relationship. The book asks a core question for all mothers and adult children: how do we perform the perplexing, sometimes terrifying act of separation from our mothers and our children while simultaneously marching toward the unknown terrain of individuality? How do we yield to this inevitable process of emotional separation from that which was once our own self? The author uses her own experiences as a daughter, as a mother of a newly-adopted baby, and as a psychoanalyst to explore an essential truth: that our relationships with our mothers affect our other significant love relationships, our values, our self-esteem, and our sense of satisfaction, often throughout the whole of our lives. She also uses the experiences of some of her patients, taken from her forty years as a practicing clinician, to provide further fascinating insights and illustration.Readers are gifted with both an internal parenting 'guide' as well as a deeply profound memoir about the internal process of being a mother that is so crucial, yet rarely looked at so intently.
Science and laughs combine in this out-of-this-world adventure, featuring illustrations by Ben Mantle! You might think that this story is going to be an intergalactic adventure filled with UFOs, black holes, killer robots and some very foul-smelling aliens. And you'd be right. But it's mostly about a boy called Jake, his embarrassing dad, and the mind-boggling question . . . are we really alone in the universe?
Knock, knock. Who's there? The grandchildren. It's one of the few phrases guaranteed to fill you with both delight and dread - the grandchildren are coming! Of course you love to see them, but what do you do with them for the next few hours - or even days? Thankfully, this book is here to guide you through. Choose from a whole host of delights: Games old and new Magic tricks that even you won't be able to mess up Jokes that will make you the first sit-down stand-up comedian The hours will fly by and, with any luck, you'll have just as much fun as they do!
My Father's Glass Eye is Jeannie's struggle to honour her father, her larger-than-life hero, but also the man who named her after his daughter from a previous marriage, a daughter who died. After his funeral, Jeannie spends the next decade in escalating mania, in and out of hospitals - increasingly obsessed with the other Jeanne. Obsession turns to investigation as she plumbs her childhood awareness of her dead half-sibling and hunts for clues into the mysterious circumstances of her death. It becomes a puzzle she she must solve to better understand herself and her father. Jeannie pulls us into her unravelling with such intimacy that her insanity becomes palpable, even logical. A brilliant exploration of the human psyche, My Father's Glass Eye deepens our definitions of love, sanity, grief, and recovery.
William McInnes, one of Australia's best-known storytellers and actors, has turned to a subject that is close to his heart. Fatherhood is about family, about memories of his father and the memories he's creating as a dad himself, with his own son and daughter. Warm, witty and nostalgic, these tales are just like a friendly chat over the back fence, or the banter of a backyard BBQ. They will stir your own memories: of hot summer days and cooling off under the sprinkler while Dad works in the garden with the radio tuned to the sports results; that time Dad tried to teach you to drive - and then got out of the car and kissed the ground; or taking your own kids on a family road trip. Fatherhood is full of memories: the happy, the hilarious, the sad, bad, and the unexpectedly poignant moments. You will laugh, you may even cry - but you will recognise yourself and those you love somewhere in these pages.
Based on the Webby award-winning Instagram account Drawings for My Grandchildren, this beautifully-illustrated book celebrates the special love shared between grandparents and their grandchildren.
Like many grandparents wishing to stay close to their grandchildren in a world in which so many families are spread across the globe, Korean grandparents Grandpa Chan and Grandma Marina, decided to learn how to use Instagram as a way to stay connected. What started as an intimate family project, their Instagram page @drawings_for_my_grandchildren has attracted a large following and their story has been featured in major press around the world. This book inspired by their Instagram page features Chan's watercolors accompanied by Marina's texts. Whether it's to celebrate Astro becoming a big brother to Lua or to share the story of how the grandparents met for the first time and fell in love during their college years, Looking Back Life was Beautiful echoes with the kind of family love that spans generations and traverses geography.
A testament to the great wisdom only grandparents can provide to younger generations, Looking Back Life Was Beautiful will inspire families to always stay close and connected.
Though anxiety has risen among young people overall, recent studies confirm that it has skyrocketed in girls since the turn of the century - so what's to blame? And how can we help our girls? In the same engaging, anecdotal style and reassuring tone that won over thousands of readers of her first book, Untangled, clinical psychologist Lisa Damour addresses the facts about psychological pressure before turning to the the many facets of girls' lives where stress hits them hard: the parental expectations they face at home, pressures at school, social anxiety among their peers, and on social media. Guiding us through these areas and more, Damour provides critical coping strategies and top tips that will help our daughters to face their fears and find out just how brave they can be.
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