Skymarine Jones (Paperback)

"The cyborg dragon followed their scent along the road, occasionally stopping to talk to cows and eating them. It would moo at herds of cattle in the fields; it would moo so loud they often as not died of heart attacks. The dragon found this very interesting. It ran into a pod of Tyrannosaurs Rex and tried to play tag with them, but they ran over a cliff in shrieking terror. It had also discovered it could fly, and had a great deal of fun dropping out of the sky like a screaming Stuka, landing next to a brontosaurus and watching it faint." Skymarine Jones - A frenzied, relentless, comic parody of all space marines and their Torus worlds. A no holds bared, humorous assault on modern science fiction - seriously, that's what it's like. As the hero and his band of drunken, bungling Skymarines blunder from disastrous battle to the next, chased by space pirates, sentient garbage disposals, and cyborg dragons. Visit the realm that couldn't exist, the Daisy Chain World, the largest artificial megastructure in the galaxy, made from thousands of lesser torus orbitals all spinning at seven kilometres a second in perfect orbit around Saturn. The Daisy Chain so complicated, so non-linear, so peculiar, it needs to be run by a computer so infinite it is housed outside the physical universe. An infinite computer at war with the very world of worlds it is supposed to govern - and is quite, quite, quite mad. Meet Skymarine Jones the accidental general who has part of Einstein's brain stuck in his head, unfortunately it's the part that deals with sex and bowel movements and as often as not leads them in the wrong direction. Listen to the Sentient Gun, a deranged nuclear-powered, robotic, talking Gatling gun - convinced it's possessed by the gods of Haitian Voodou. Walk across civilizations where the idea of rationality has gone the way of the diabetic dinosaur. Join Jonsey and his small army of twelve idiots on the Torus World of all Torus Worlds