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Don'teven "think" of starting this bookunless you're sitting in a
comfortable chair and have lots of time. Afast-paced,
impossible-to-put-down adventure awaits as the young orphan
Peterand his mates are dispatched to an island ruled by the evil
King Zarboff. Theyset sail aboard the "Never" "Land," a ship
carrying a precious and mysterious trunk inits cargo hold, and the
journey quickly becomes fraught with excitement anddanger.
In this "little gem" (Washington Independent Review of Books), Pulitzer Prize-winning columnist and New York Times bestselling author Dave Barry learns how to age happily from his old but joyful dog, Lucy. As Dave Barry turns seventy-not happily-he realizes that his dog, Lucy, is dealing with old age far better than he is. She has more friends, fewer worries, and way more fun. So Dave decides to figure out how Lucy manages to stay so happy, to see if he can make his own life happier by doing the things she does (except for drinking from the toilet). He reconnects with old friends and tries to make new ones-which turns out to be a struggle, because Lucy likes people a lot more than he does. And he gets back in touch with two ridiculous but fun groups from his past: the Lawn Rangers, a group of guys who march in parades pushing lawnmowers and twirling brooms (alcohol is involved), and the Rock Bottom Remainders, the world's oldest and least-talented all-author band. With each new lesson, Dave riffs hilariously on dogs, people, and life in general, while also pondering Deep Questions, such as when it's okay to lie. (Answer: when scallops are involved.) Lessons From Lucy shows readers a new side to Dave Barry that's "touching and sentimental, but there's still a laugh on every page" (The Sacramento Bee). The master humorist has written a witty and affable guide to joyous living at any age.
A New York Times bestseller--a brilliantly funny exploration of the Sunshine State from the man who knows it best: Pulitzer Prize winner Dave Barry. We never know what will happen next in Florida. We know only that, any minute now, something will. Every few months, Dave Barry gets a call from some media person wanting to know, "What the hell is wrong with Florida?" Somehow, the state's acquired an image as a subtropical festival of stupid, and as a loyal Floridian, Dave begs to differ. Join him as he goes in hunt of the legendary Skunk Ape; hobnobs with the mermaids of Weeki Wachee Springs; and visits Cassadaga, the psychic capital of the world, to have his dog's aura read (apparently, she's "very spiritual"). Hitch a ride for the non-stop thrills of alligator-wrestling ("the gators display the same fighting spirit as a Barcalounger"), the hair-raising spectacle of a clothing-optional bar in Key West, and the manly manliness of the Machine Gun Experience in Miami. It's the most hilarious book yet from "the funniest damn writer in the whole country" (Carl Hiaasen, and he should know). By the end, you'll have to admit that whatever else you might think about Florida--you can never say it's boring.
Dave Barry makes his fiction debut with a ferociously funny novel of love and mayhem in south Florida. In the city of Coconut Grove, Florida, these things happen: A struggling adman named Eliot Arnold drives home from a meeting with the Client From Hell. His teenage son, Matt, fills a Squirtmaster 9000 for his turn at a high school game called Killer. Matt's intended victim, Jenny Herk, sits down in front of the TV with her mom for what she hopes will be a peaceful evening for once. Jenny's alcoholic and secretly embezzling stepfather, Arthur, emerges from the maid's room, angry at being rebuffed. Henry and Leonard, two hit men from New Jersey, pull up to the Herks' house for a real game of Killer, Arthur's embezzlement apparently not having been quite so secret to his employers after all. And a homeless man named Puggy settles down for the night in a treehouse just inside the Herks' yard. In a few minutes, a chain of events that will change the lives of each and every one of them will begin, and will leave some of them wiser, some of them deader, and some of them definitely looking for a new line of work. With a wicked wit, razor-sharp observations, rich characters, and a plot with more twists than the Inland Waterway, Dave Barry makes his debut a complete and utter triumph.
In this riveting and adventure-packed follow-up to "Peter and the
Starcatchers," we discover Peter leaving the relative safety of
Mollusk Island-along with his trusted companion Tinker Bell-for the
cold, damp streets of London. On a difficult journey across the
sea, he and Tink discover the dark and deadly, slithering
part-man/part-creature Lord Ombra. It seems that the dreaded Ombra
has a variety of mysterious powers including the ability to make
shadows disappear. When Peter reaches London, he sets out to find
the indomitable Molly. Together they must combat Ombra's terrible
forces to both protect the Starcatchers and the treasured starstuff
and most importantly to rescue Molly's mother from the clutches of
evil. Dave Barry and Ridley Pearson have done it again-written a
compulsively readable, impossible-to-put-down tale that will
delight readers of all ages.
In this "little gem" (Washington Independent Review of Books), Pulitzer Prize-winning columnist and New York Times bestselling author Dave Barry learns how to age happily from his old but joyful dog, Lucy. As Dave Barry turns seventy--not happily--he realizes that his dog, Lucy, is dealing with old age far better than he is. She has more friends, fewer worries, and way more fun. So Dave decides to figure out how Lucy manages to stay so happy, to see if he can make his own life happier by doing the things she does (except for drinking from the toilet). He reconnects with old friends and tries to make new ones--which turns out to be a struggle, because Lucy likes people a lot more than he does. And he gets back in touch with two ridiculous but fun groups from his past: the Lawn Rangers, a group of guys who march in parades pushing lawnmowers and twirling brooms (alcohol is involved), and the Rock Bottom Remainders, the world's oldest and least-talented all-author band. With each new lesson, Dave riffs hilariously on dogs, people, and life in general, while also pondering Deep Questions, such as when it's okay to lie. (Answer: when scallops are involved.) Lessons from Lucy shows readers a new side to Dave Barry that's "touching and sentimental, but there's still a laugh on every page" (Sacramento Bee). The master humorist has written a witty and affable guide to joyous living at any age.
In this hilarious novel, written in the voice of eighth-grader Wyatt Palmer, Dave Barry takes us on a class trip to Washington, DC. Wyatt, his best friend, Matt, and a few kids from Culver Middle School find themselves in a heap of trouble-not just with their teachers, who have long lost patience with them-but from several mysterious men they first meet on their flight to the nation's capital. In a fast-paced adventure with the monuments as a backdrop, the kids try to stay out of danger and out of the doghouse while trying to save the president from attack-or maybe not.
When funnyman Dave Barry asked readers about their least favorite tunes, he thought he was penning just another installment of his weekly syndicated humor column. But the witty writer was flabbergasted by the response when over 10,000 readers voted. "I have never written a column that got a bigger response than the one announcing the Bad Song Survey," Barry wrote.Based on the results of the survey, Dave Barry's Book of Bad Songs is a compilation of some of the worst songs ever written. Dave Barry fans will relish his quirky take. Music buffs, too will appreciate this humorous stroll through the world's worst lyrics. The only thing wrong with this book is that readers will find themselves unable to stop mentally singing the greatest hits of Gary Puckett.
In this riveting and adventure-packed follow-up to the award-winning "New York Times" bestseller "Peter and the Starcatchers," Peter leaves the relative safety of Mollusk Island?along with his trusted companion, Tinker Bell?for the cold, damp, dangerous streets of London. On a difficult journey across the sea, he and Tink discover the dark and deadly slithering part-man/part-creature Lord Ombra, who is intent on recovering the missing starstuff?celestial dust that contains unimagined powers. In London, Peter attempts to track down the indomitable Molly, hoping that together they can combat Ombra's determined forces. But London is not Mollusk Island; Peter is not the boy he used to be; and Lord Ombra?the Shadow Master?is unlike anything Peter, or the world, has ever seen.
In this classic crack-up of a book, Dave Barry gives his wacky
perspective on sex, childbirth, parenting and other forms of slow,
Seth Weinstein always knew Tina was way, way, "way "out of his
league. Which is why he's still astonished that he's on a plane
heading for their wedding in Florida. The Groom Posse has already
pulled an airport prank on him--and he's survived It should be easy
going from now on.
Pulitzer Prize-winning humorist Dave Barry is a pretty amiable guy. But lately, he’s been getting a little worked up. What could make a mild-mannered man of words so hot under the collar? Well, a lot of things–like bad public art, Internet millionaires, SUVs, Regis Philbin . . . and even bigger problems, like
" One of the funniest peole ever to tap tap on a PC."
"Dave Barry is one funny human."
When every hiccup sounds like the call of doom, each stomach pang hints at incipient cancer, and a headache means it's time to firm up your last will and testament, The Hypochondriac's Guide to Life. And Death. provides just the relief you need. Gene Weingarten has spent his whole life immersed in the eclectic details of bizarre symptoms, self-diagnosing every minor ache as a potentially deadly disease. Weingarten examines:
Blending the neurotic anxieties of Woody Allen, the folksiness of Garrison Keillor, and the absurdist vision of Dave Barry, Gene Weingarten conjures up a hilarious prescription for the hypochondriac that lurks inside all of us.
From the Pulitzer Prize-winning journalist comes a celebration of the aging process. Not just Dave's, but that of the whole Baby Boom Generation--those millions of us who set a standard for whining self-absorption that will never be equaled, and who gave birth to such stunning accomplishments as Saturday Night Live!, the New Age movement, and call waiting. Here Dave pinpoints the glaring signs that you've passed the half-century mark:
" Just the ticket for the '90s."
Following the bestselling success of Dave's novel, "Big Trouble," here is a hilarious new collection of columns from the writer critics have called "the funniest man in America."
What's been getting Dave Barry all worked up lately? What can possibly induce him to rise up?yes, actually out of his chair?in indignation? Well, lots of things. For instance?
The plague of low-flow toiletsDay trading and other careers that never require you to take off your bathrobeThe parent-misery quotient of school science fairsPine-sap transfusions for tired Christmas treesThe real skinny on the IRS, Donald Trump, the airlines, and so much more.?
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