The Humorist; A Companion for the Christmas Fireside (Paperback)

This historic book may have numerous typos, missing text, images, or index. Purchasers can download a free scanned copy of the original book (without typos) from the publisher. 1832. Not illustrated. Excerpt: ... Is that your horse ? How fat he is I'm sure You did not buy the creature at Nagpoor. Did you use bows and arrows upon service ? Those brahmins are brave troops, I understand; They're natives, are they not, of Newfoundland ? And, Colonel, did you ever shoot a dervise? And is it like a paroquet, a green bird? And sepoys--what's a sepoy ? -- a marine bird ?" Louisa hoped, by this affected jargon, To make the brave Sir Christopher declare off; But he in love was, probably, too far gone, And thought, perhaps, such childishness would wear off When she'd the benefit of the society Of one of his dense wisdom and sobriety. Miss Phoebe, whom we've introduced already, Display'd a perfect contrast to her cousin, Whose tongue was running " nineteen to the dozen," Being, most grave, sententious, and steady. She had been, in her time, a " bonnie lassie," But was, at this same juncture, un peu passee; In fact, she long had pass'd the season vernal, And, knowing of Louisa's predilection, Would not, it seems, have had the least ob- jection To the refusal of the gallant Colonel: And thus Sir Kit lay open to the arts Of her who did, and her who did not choose him; While both to admiration play'd their parts, The one to gain, the other one to lose him. It was our heroine's policy to raise In Christopher's esteem her cousin Phoebe, Whose name she never mention'd but with praise: " O what a treasure," Lou exclaim'd, " would she be To him who could but coax her into marriage " While Phoebe, ('twas concerted by this pair Of deep conspirators, ) should, an contraire, Avail of each occasion to disparage Louisa in the Colonel's estimation; And Phoebe, to this end, whene'er she saw Need for its use, had a carte blanche to draw Ad libitum on her imagination. One day, as Phoebe wit...