This historic book may have numerous typos and missing text. Purchasers can download a free scanned copy of the original book (without typos) from the publisher. Not indexed. Not illustrated. 1922 Excerpt: ...see," says he. Sure'n I didn't know anything, how to get out of it then, so I piled in, "for," says I to myself, "never let on to any one that you don't know anything, but make them believe that you do know all about it." So says I to him, takin' up me shillalah this way (holding a very crooked stick perpendicular), "Well take that for the straight line of the earth's equator"--how's that for gehography? (to the audience). Ah, that was straight till the other day I bent it in an argument. "Very good," says he. "Well," says I, "now the sun rises in the east" (placing the disengaged hand at the eastern end of the stick). Well, he couldn't deny that. "And when he gets up he Darts his rosy beams Through the mornin' gleams." Do you moind the poetry there? (to the audience with a smile). "And he keeps on risin' and risin' till he reaches his meriden." "What's that?" says he. "His dinnertoime, ' says I; "sure 'n that's my Latin for dinner-toime, and when he gets his dinner He sinks to rest Behind the glorious hills of the west.' Oh, begorra, there's more poetry I fail it creepin' out all over me. "There," says I, well satisfied with myself, "will that do for ye?" "You haven't got done with him yet," says he. "Done with him," says I kinder mad like; "what more do you want me to do with him? Didn't I bring him from the east to the west? What more do you want?" "Oh," says he, "you'll have to bring him back again to the east to rise next mornin'." By Saint Patrick and wasn't I near betrayin' me ignorance. Sure'n I thought there was a large family of suns, and they rise one after the other. But I...