Bones; His Anecdotes and Goaks (Paperback)

This historic book may have numerous typos and missing text. Purchasers can download a free scanned copy of the original book (without typos) from the publisher. Not indexed. Not illustrated. 1870 edition. Excerpt: ...you eber seed. Oh who ever heard of a sugar cane growing out of tha sea? No, no, I mean dat de wind blowed a--a--a--You mean that it blowed a hurricane. Yes, dat's it; case I know eberything was in a hurry, den it came. Well, my wife had her watch on deck Your wife had her watch on deck Why, dat's do flrst time dat I ebcr knowed your wife had a watch. What was it--galvanized? No, no, I mean dat my wife was on deck, an her watch Why you are not going to say your wife lost her watch overboard Poor lady I mean to say dat my wife--my wife--oh none ob your bissnes8 He means to say, Bones, that his wife kept watch on deck, that is, looked out for squalls. Did she get any? Any what, sir? Squirrels. None ob yor bismess Well, by by, I heard my wife sing out, 'Squarm ahead ' Storm ahead, sir. No, she said 'squarm.' She knows what she means--she knows. So I rushed on deck, seized hold of helen Who was Helen--your wife? No Oh then it was your mother? No, it wasn't ' " Well, who was Helen, then? Why, de ting dat you steer by. Oh you mean the helm. Yes. Well, den, in less dan one minnit we was all four in de water. All four in de water Why I thought dere was only three of you? Well, wasn't de boat one? Oh I didn't know you recognised the boat as one. Yes. It didn't recognise us, dough, when it capsized us in de water. Well, I suppose, as you were in the water, you struck out manfully. Yes, I struck out, but I couldn't hit no man, dough. I mean to say, you breasted the wares. Yes; one wave struck me, an it like to stove my breast in. Why didn't you call on some one to preserve you? I did call on Preserve, but he wouldn't come. Well, did you eventually succeed in reaching terra firma? He wasn't wid us. Who wasn't with you? Teddy Firma. I mean, ...