Bohemia Invaded; And Other Stories (Paperback)

This historic book may have numerous typos and missing text. Purchasers can download a free scanned copy of the original book (without typos) from the publisher. Not indexed. Not illustrated. 1895 Excerpt: ...morning. As a general thing a Squarer remains single to the day of his death, partly because marriage would interfere seriously with the practice of the profession to which he has given his life, and partly because the mere fact of his being actively engaged in squaring serves to awaken a bitter prejudice against him and a keen suspicion of his motives in the minds of the various wives, aunts, mothers-in-law, and other feminine relatives of the men whom he has befriended. I am positive that if any young woman were to receive marked attentions from a notorious Squarer every other woman would warn her against marrying a man of such terribly dissipated habits--the one who kept your Uncle George out so late that dreadful night and had the im pudence to come home with him and stay to breakfast, too." In order that my readers may gain some idea of the nature, extent, and variety of the duties which the Squarer performs as a matter of love and with a zeal akin to that with which a Rothschild enters upon a transaction in three per cent, bonds, let us picture to ourselves a scene in the residential quarter of the town on a cold Sunday morning just as the dawn is beginning to streak the eastern horizon with streaks of pale gray light. The figure of a man clad in pajamas may be seen peering cautiously out from behind thick curtains through the partially opened window of the room on the ground floor. Two or three snowballs, hurled by a strong arm, are flattened against the panes of glass, and the gentleman who leans rather unsteadily on the fence railing holds another in his hand and is saying plaintively to the gentleman inside: "Yes, it's me, old man, and I want you to go home with me and square it with my wife. You've gotter come I tell you I dassent show...