The World's Wit and Humor (Volume 2); An Encyclopedia of the Classic Wit and Humor of All Ages and Nations (Paperback)

This historic book may have numerous typos, missing text or index. Purchasers can download a free scanned copy of the original book (without typos) from the publisher. 1912. Not illustrated. Excerpt: ... Charles Graham Halpine Irish Astronomy O'ryan was a man of might Whin Ireland was a nation, But poachin' was his heart's delight And constant occupation. He had an ould militia gun, And sartin sure his aim was; He gave the keepers many a run, And wouldn't mind the game laws. St. Pathrick wanst was passin' by O'Ryan's little houldin', And, as the saint felt wake and dhry, He thought he'd enther bould in. "O'Ryan," says the saint, "avick To praich at Thurles I'm goin'; So let me have a rasher quick And a dhrop of Innishowen." "No rasher will I cook for you While betther is to spare, sir, But here's a jug of mountain dew, And there's a rattlin' hare, sir." St. Pathrick he looked mighty sweet, And says he, "Good luck attind you, And when you're in your windin' sheet, It's up to heaven I'll sind you." O'Ryan gave his pipe a whiS-- "Them tidin's is thransportin', But may I ax your saintship if There's any kind of sportin'?" St. Pathrick said, "A Lion's there, Two Bears, a Bull, and Cancer"-- "Bedad," says Mick, "the huntin's rare; St. Pathrick, I'm your man, sir." So to conclude my song aright, For fear I'd tire your patience, You'll see O'Ryan any night Amid the constellations. And Venus follows in his track Till Mars grows jealous raally, But, faith, he fears the Irish knack Of handling the shillaly. Charles Dudley Warner My Summer in a Garden SECOND WEEK Next to deciding when to start your garden, the most important matter is what to put in it. It is difficult to decide what to order for dinner on a given day: how much more oppressive is it to order in a lump an endless vista of dinners, so to speak For, unless your garden is a boundless prairie (and mine seems to me to be that when I hoe it on hot days), you must make a selection, from the great variety of veget...