The Journal of Marie Bashkirtseff (Volume 1) (Paperback)

This historic book may have numerous typos, missing text or index. Purchasers can download a free scanned copy of the original book (without typos) from the publisher. 1890. Not illustrated. Excerpt: ... many obscure hints, that I got depressed and uneasy too. I got into the carriage at last about midnight. Aunt was crying, but I held my head very high to prevent any tears from falling. The guard gave the signal, and for the first time in my life I was quite alone I began to cry out loud, but don't think that I did not turn my tears to good account. I studied from Nature how we cry. "Look here, my dear," I said to myself, getting up, "enough of that." It was high time. I was in Russia. On getting out of the carriage I fell into the arms of my uncle, of two policemen, and two Custom-house officials. They treated me like a princess, and did not even examine my luggage. The station is large; the railway people are a fine set, and uncommonly civiL Everything was so nice that I thought I was in Utopia. A common policeman here is better than an officer in France. I may as well remark here, that there is something to be said on behalf of our poor Emperor--people say that there is something queer about his eyes. Every one who wears a helmet--and there are not a few at Wirballen--has the same sort of eyes. I don't know whether it is due to the weight of the helmet over the eyes, or to imitation. It may be imitation, because it is well known in France that all his soldiers had a look of Napoleon. They gave me a compartment to myself, and after I had talked over business and other matters with my uncle, I went to sleep, raging inwardly about my telegram to A . You can get a good lunch at the station refreshmentrooms, so I got out pretty often. I can't say that my fellow-countrymen roused any feeling in particular in me--nothing of the rapture I feel when I come again to a country I have seen before. Still I felt very sympathetic towards them, and I began to feel very happ...